Anime and why it can piss off

It's time someone came out with this, and as someone not known for being backward when it comes to being forward, I guess it falls to me to say it. Like Lazlo Woodbine, I never learnt to play reggae in the Australian hinterland, so I don't know how to beat around the bush. And only a frog wets the bed when there's a rain hat in the closet, if you know what I mean, and I'm sure you do.

"Sledge, you dumbass, quit the comedy novel references and tell us what you're going on about," I shall pretend, for the purposes of continuing this already overly-verbose article, you've said. Well, it's quite simple. Anime sucks. Yeah, all those fucking Japanese cartoons with little girls being sodomised by tentacled monsters, or people with preposterous hair making a thirty second fight last half an hour via the medium of shouting the name of each attack while the background flares into a Star Wars hyperspace effect. It sucks.

Ok, I appreciate that that's a sweeping statement. And yes, you get the occasional good piece of anime. In much the same way that you get the occasional child who can play piano concertos at the age of three. But it's not the mind-boggling stupidity of most of anime that bugs me. It's the fact that every anime fan on Earth seems compelled to make "videos" of their favorite piece of music with clips from anime. They then upload these videos to Youtube, where they get in the way of me finding the actual music video I want. And then, to compound the problem, every anime fan on Earth uploads THE SAME FUCKING VIDEO. What the titty-fucking hell is the point of that? Here's a hint: if you've found a video on the net and want to share via Youtube, check to see if it's already there. Unless you just made it yourself, it probably is.

I realise this is a small gripe in the grand scheme of things, but if we can address the little problems, maybe the world will be a better place. Or at least one where I don't swear so often.